The early morning dawned grand and beautiful and festive for all of us. We were at a village off Palghat for my cousin's wedding in a few hours from then. We were to get ready, go to the temple ( only in Kerala you see a lot of people starting their day with temple visit as early as 5:00 A.M), and then reach the venue at 6:30 A.M.
Scene 1 :
It was me cribbing about my frizzy hair. No matter what trick I tried, it just would not set the way I wanted it to. I tried my best to avoid oiling my hair that morning. I didn't want the shine of the oil in the photographs. People suggested that either I try applying some oil and get the work done or just stay there for the rest of the day setting my hair style right, while they all march off to the temple first and then to the hall.
Reluctantly,,,,,,,,, very reluctantly I looked around for coconut oil. I was walking around the house to find the home-made coconut oil that the bride's party brought for us the previous night.
My father's old aunt had also come for the wedding. She is 93 years old. She was all set to go for the wedding when I crossed the chair where she was seated. I loved her blue Saree and stopped to compliment her. I told her, " Paati, lovely Saree.. Give us few more minutes and we'll all go together". I recalled that this aunt once used to have long hair that used to be very thick and jet black. Now, for convenience and maintainability, she has asked for a cropped hair. To me, she looked all perfect.
She was waiting for the rest of the clan to get ready, so someone can accompany her to the venue. At least this is what I thought. I am not yet my presentable self for a wedding. I still have a complete hair-do to finish. She called me to ask what I am looking for. I said, "Hair oil". She immediately said, " I've also asked for it. Wait here. You see, my hair is a little frizzy and dry. This is not the way I should go for a wedding. I want to apply some oil and comb it neat enough to be presentable."
I didn't have anything to say after that. I quietly applied oil on my supposedly long and dry and frizzy hair, I tamed it to my usual hair-style and set out for the wedding function.
A 93-year-old thinks that oil is the best thing for a disciplined hair style. A lot of us youngsters think that the same oil is out-of-trend for hair styles. Beauticians say the same thing about applying oil to your hair to maintain its beauty.
As the wedding was based in a small village, we saw a lot of disciplined hair styles. I am wondering what this grand old Paati will say if she gets to go for a city wedding where people come with their hair let loose, hair falling all over the face and sweeping the hair off the eyes every time they nod, which they do all the time :)..
Time changes.. Opinions change.. Life changes... It is not about what is correct or incorrect, it is about how different we think from the grand old people's days. How do we expect them to understand everything that is happening in our lives today, and everything that we do today? I think, we cannot explain our actions to them ( our basis of thoughts is very different and baseless at times) and cannot understand their rationale behind why they are saying what they are ( Mostly they know why they are doing what they are doing and can reason out most of their actions) .
The next time someone from the grand old clan says anything that we cannot agree, its best to appreciate their wisdom and take what works for us and NOT complain about them. We just have to move on with a smile, a humble smile will work better, I must say.
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